Tag Archives: mental-health

Thoughtful Thursday #275 – Getting Unstuck – Outside of the Box Techniques

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I have an extensive trauma history and trauma recovery, my mother was schizophrenic and my father was an addict so I have spent years undoing the damage they created in my life.

I write to the dissociated parts of my inner world, for example, when one grows up in a chronically unsafe environment our thinking becomes separated into different parts so we can function, we become many different parts rather than a cohesive thinking person. For more information on this read Dr. Richard Schwartz who popularized the Internal Family System method of therapy. This actually saved me, I have had dramatic results since beginning this therapy.

To get in touch with my inner parts who are exiled children and young versions of myself, also the stealth defenses and disassociation I experience, I write to them.

Dear Inner Children, Thank you for hanging in there during the tremendous pain you had to endure and keeping us alive, you did not deserve any of that bad treatment, you are safe now, if there is anything you want to share I am always listening.

Dear Defenses: you have done a splendid job in keeping me safe by isolating me from very harmful situations, I am truly thankful, we are safe now and if there is anything you want to share I am always listening.

I write everyday and much deeply buried information comes to light and I become free and unburden from the fears and entrapment of living in the past.

I also meditate on a regular basis, it is one way of grounding, I practice my art everyday and that is grounding. I go to therapy and speak to anyone who will listen about how important mental health is.

Do whatever you need to do to heal what is weighing heavy on your mind, you don’t deserve to be so troubled and afflicted. You deserve a wonderful happy life, find what you need to be a whole functioning person. You are so worth it.

Thoughtful Thursday #274 – Mass Murder and Mental Health

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There are many Mass Murderers in recent history who murder lots of innocent people. Their methods of murder vary.

These actions are typical of a walking wounded adult child. This behavior may have be a last ditch effort to ease the psychological pain the person endured their entire life. Or perhaps their mind is so twisted from the ongoing dysfunction of a pathological household they actually enjoy hurting as many people as possible, or maybe they are not in touch with their own humanity and feel justified in this heinous actions.These actions are caused from poor mental health.

I am sure there are red flags in this type of self absorbed behavior for a very long time. However no one came forward to report concerns to the authorities.

Normal people don’t go around destroying others, it’s a simple fact.

Mental health is the number one concern next to physical health to live in this fast moving world.  the The need for mental health information and practical resources must come into the public view more readily to end these useless acts of violence.

I will certainly keep writing about ending senseless violence on all levels by reminding everyone to take their mental health seriously.

Let’s talk about it. Let’s talk about mental health, we will all be so much happier.

Thoughtful Thursday #271 – José Micard Teixeira Author & Coach

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Here’s a post from one of my favorite writers, in this short article he says what most of us want to express.

His writing is a reminder that we must choose to be ourselves always even if you are unsure, scared or insecure. Live like  “a rebel with no shame” as Mr. Teixeira says.

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I repel everything that’s supposed to be. I reject everything that it’s imposed on me. I can’t stand conditions or hierarchies. All this immodesty and false humility angers me. I have a hard time accepting injustice and prejudice. I hardly can make friendships and partnerships because it demands from me what I don’t want or know how to give. I’m a loner with an optimistic attitude who seeks to postpone everyday his mental illness. I’m not mad, but I love the madness in finding me mad. I’m proud of who I am. I’m not going to change for anyone. I don’t care about what others think of me. I do what I want and I say whatever I feel like. I’m a rebel with no shame. There’s nothing else to do. I’ll die smiling.

José Micard Teixeira
Author & Coach

Thoughtful Thursday #267 – Resistance

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In psychology resistance is the push me pull me effect of dealing with uncomfortable and sometimes buried fears of change.

This can happen as a reaction to the therapeutic process or irritating situation that we just don’t want to deal with.

Resistance can show up in many forms, inner oppression, focusing on outside events, over eating, too much social media, self criticism, social withdrawal, trying to be perfect, you can add to the list.

A common reason for resistance is shame, that burning feeling of humiliation, of being wrong, or like a fool, regret, self hate.

“Family secrets can go back for generations. They can be about suicides, homicides, incest, abortions, addictions, public loss of face, financial disaster, etc. All the secrets get acted out. This is the power of toxic shame. The pain and suffering of shame generate automatic and unconscious defenses. Freud called these defenses by various names: denial, idealization of parents, repression of emotions and dissociation from emotions. What is important to note is that we can’t know what we don’t know. Denial, idealization, repression and dissociation are unconscious survival mechanisms. Because they are unconscious, we lose touch with the shame, hurt and pain they cover up. We cannot heal what we cannot feel. So without recovery, our toxic shame gets carried for generations.”
― John Bradshaw, Healing the Shame that Binds You

John Bradshaw sums it up, “all secrets get acted out”, and “we cannot heal what we cannot feel”, it is in your best interest to get into some kind of recovery program. You owe it to your wonderful self. You are deserving of every good thing in life, you are important and are strong enough to heal.

Start now, go in baby steps, read books about good mental health, go to therapy, join support groups, start your own support group, start a diary and write everything you think down on paper to give your feelings life and validity.

Don’t give up, there is massive healing possible, just keep trying. I know you can do it.

 

 

Thoughtful Thursday – #255 – May Is Mental Health Month

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Here in USA it is May is Mental Health Month. The idea behind this is to bring out in the open any mental health issues and get rid of any stigma attached to it.

Trauma, substance abuse, mental illness, OCD, PTSD are just a few manifestations of mental health challenges.

There is nothing wrong with having mental health challenges and it’s important not to let these challenges fester. The sooner you take an interest in your own mental health the better you will feel. Go to therapy, read up on the issues bothering you, write, exercise, explore a hobby, continue the list in your own way.

It won’t be easy but you are so worth the effort.

Thoughtful Thursday #243 – How To Get Unstuck

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Are you a victim to perfectionism or failure, racing thoughts, numbness, confusion, addictions, inability to trust, poor self talk?

We can treat ourselves in such an awful way by not taking care of ourselves physically and mentally.

Actually mental health is paramount for a successful life.

One way of easing our troubled minds is to ask questions.
Why was I triggered by that comment, why did I slink away from a potential intimate moment, why did I run away so fast that it actually scared me, why did I act that way?

Take a piece of paper or open a word document and start writing every possible scenario, keep going until you can’t think of anything else. By doing this you release all the power of holding these types of concerns in your head.

I guarantee you will be surprised at the insight and peace you experience.  Asking questions to yourself is another tool in your resource box for getting unstuck and have clear mental health.

Thoughtful Thursday #233 – The Common Denominator

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Shortly after any horrific shooting it is common that politicians and rallies to hop on the bandwagon to complain that the common denominator is  guns. Take away guns and there will be no more shootings.

That is not true, I can’t understand why ninety-nine percent of the public don’t mention that the common denominator is mental health. Normal people don’t go around shooting people, nor do they commit crimes. Most people are living their lives as best they can with families and jobs and everyday ups and downs.

There must have been red flags all along with these perpetrators. But what can the average person do about it.

How about starting to keep notes about what is seen and heard. If anything happens at least there will be some log to back up much-needed treatment. Anonymously report suspicious activity to the authorities. Do take any precautions to keep yourself safe.

The mentally ill cannot be forced into treatment but they can get help especially if they repeatedly violate the law, have chronic homelessness, aggressiveness and so on and you can be part of helping them. Look up Laura’s Law and Kendra’s Law.

Mental illness runs in my family. There were very little services available those many years ago and as a result there was so much violence and dysfunction and damage emotionally, financially and physically.

We live in wonderful times where finding information and services for mental health issues are readily available. If you or someone you know has mental health issues or need services, get on the internet and search for information talk to your doctor. Keep searching for the services you need. There is no reason to live in the dark, disturbing world of mental illness.

 

Mental Disorder and Mental Health Problem

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Mental Health Disorder is an illness that is diagnosable. The illness affects a person’s thinking, emotional state and behavior and disrupts their lives. Examples are depression and anxiety which is common and the not so common schizophrenia and bipolar disorder which can lead to a disability.

Mental Health Problem is a much broader term that included both mental health disorders and symptoms of mental disorders that may not be  severe enough to warrant a diagnosis of a mental disorder.

Slang terms used for mental health issues are crazy, psycho, mad, loony, nuts, cracked up and wacko. None of these terms are helpful for give much information on the subject.

Helpful Resources for your mental health and if you are assisting others.

National Institute of Mental Health – http://www.nimh.nih.gov

World Health Organization – http://www.who.int/topics/global_burden_of_disease/en/

 

 

From: Chapter 1 of Mental Health First Aid USA ISBN:978-00692-60748-0

 

Thoughtful Thursday #212 – Getting Unstuck

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I get stuck a lot when I want to try something new that I know will help me immensely.  I get stuck when I want to stop an unnecessary action that does not help me at all.

I am far from perfect in growing as a functional human being but I am committed in finding a way to  have a mentally healthy life.

Here is what I learned the hard way.

1. taking action, any action, is the number one way to stay in touch with my true self. If I do nothing, I stay stagnant.

2. when I have thoughts full of worry I stop and ask where are these thoughts coming from. Are they from past belief or what is               going on presently. Mostly the thoughts are from the past or worry about things I am not sure of.

3. being mindful of my thoughts and actions help me be more grounded and less distracted.

4. being kind to myself in thoughts and actions brings lots of productivity.

5. taking some quiet time every day helps me stay calm more often.

Growing as a functional human being is a very personal path. There is no right or wrong way. The right way is your way. There are many resources in books and online to get you started on your journey. Being right where you are and you will slowly find your way to have a healthy mental and emotional life.

 

 

 

Thoughtful Thursday #211 – ALGEE

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Most have never seen this acronym. I learned it in my Mental Health First Aid class. This is the acronym for the action plan for anyone dealing with trying to help others with mental or physical distress. Many times those closest to us reveal their problems and we want to help but don’t know how. Here’s an effective action plan.

Action A – Assess for risk of suicide or harm. Is the person having suicidal thoughts or behaviors, or engaging in non-suicidal self-injury like cutting.

Action L – Listen non-judgmentally. This can be hard in a crisis, instead try very hard not to express your own negative judgements. Stay calm.

Action G – Give reassurance and information. Treat the person with kindness and respect and give hope for recovery. Have empathy.

Action E – Encourage appropriate professional help. Refer to resources like mental health care providers. Give ideas where to get help.

Action E – Encourage self-help and other support strategies. Healthy lifestyle, support system, problem solving, belief in taking control of their life.

If someone is out of control and dangerous to you or themselves call 911.

 

Here’s just a few Helpful Resources:

If you are in NYC call 1-888-NYC-WELL. They will help all age groups.

Suggest going to their personal physician and ask for resources for mental health.

The Balanced Mind Foundation – http://www.bpkids.org

Cyberbullying Research Center – http://www.cyberbullying.us

National Alliance on Mental Illness – http://www.nami.org

American Psychiatric Association Answer Center – 1-888-357-7924

American Psychological Association Public Education Line – 1-800-964-2000

Hope this helps.

As a helper you can get overwhelmed by another’s mental health issues.

As a helper it is perfectly OK to reach out for help too.

As a helper your work is important.

Good Luck.