Monthly Archives: August 2013

Thoughtful Thursdays #31

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As some of you know I have a very big dog. His name is Rocky and he is 133 pounds. This past Sunday night we were at the dog park. There were many dogs there including one that my dog occasionally plays with. The other dog (who is almost as big as mine) likes to dominate my dog. They end up playfully defending themselves until the other dog decided that he had enough and lopped off a quarter size piece of his right ear. Blood was streaming everywhere and I alerted the other dog owner. Initially they were apologetic and offer5ed to pay the vet. Then they wanted me to pay half. The husband and wife owners of this dog at this point started to get nasty and accused my dog of first starting a fight. They knew full well that their dog was the culprit. I threatened them by saying I would report their dog to animal control.

Since it was late on a Sunday we had to find an emergency vet. We found one and the other dog owners said they would pay the entire vet bill. They did not come with me to the vet and when the vet called for payment they refused to pay the sedative portion of the bill. They ended up paying $400 of the vet and I paid $146. These people were conniving, took advantage of me and are irresponsible dog owners.

Part of me wants to get even, the other part of me wants peace. I doubt it they will come to the part again if they see me and my dog there. I could call animal control and make a complaint or I could just let it go.
I have decided to let it go. Getting even is a useless attempt at trying to control the happiness or unhappiness of others and an attempt to relieve my frustration and anger.

I have the right to my frustration and anger. However, I have decided to leave it alone. because just knowing and believing “what goes around comes around” is enough for me. I believe if I act against them it will come back to me and I know their lying will come back to them.

My dog was well taken care of at the vet and very healthy in spite of losing part of his ear. He now has an interesting battle would, a conversation piece and I can go on with a clean conscious.

Can’t wait to get back to the park.

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Thoughtful Thursdays #30

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Everything starts with a thought.

Ever notice when you are upset with something your thinking is out of control. You find yourself spiraling down an abyss of negativity and can’t pull out of it. You feel angry, helpless, hopeless and unable to focus. The obsessive thinking starts and before you know it you are drained and unhappy.

There’s good news and only good news. These are only thoughts and thoughts can be changed. You are the power and authority in your world and at anytime you can change your mind.

I know you are not convinced because your ego is addicted to the drama of the situation.
Try this; based on the Queen of Affirmations philosophy of Ms. Louse Hay, her belief and mine, are that staying focused on what is positive will bring the best results.

Here are some affirmations. Write them 10 times each, your mind with fight you but you are the boss not your mind. In a short time you will calm down and feel better.

I open new doors to life.

I always have a choice.

I am worthy of all good.

I release all tension, I release all anger and I release all resistance.

I forgive all past experiences.

I love and accept myself.

These are just a few positive affirmations; there are tons of affirmations in books and on the Internet. Find some that resonate for you and use them.

So,

What Are You Thinking?

How To Survive Getting Dumped

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Bam. Wait, what just happened? You find yourself being dumped and at first it’s impossible to believe. Your feelings are raw; it’s draining and painful. The tears don’t stop. The questions are endless. How did this happen? Whose fault is this? Did I miss something? Hold on a minute. Take a breath and read the following.

Relationships end for many reasons, it might be fear of intimacy, feeling vulnerable, don’t love the partner enough, using you for their own selfish reasons, or have other plans where you don’t fit into. There may be a need to step back, be objective and get clarity. Perhaps the relationship has lived out its usefulness.

The good news is that at some time or another everyone gets dumped. You will get over it. Here are a few practical steps to help you move on.

1. Don’t think you will never find love again – do you have a crystal ball?
2. Sit with and don’t react to the broken heart feelings – they will pass.
3. Talk it out with friends or a professional.
4. Even if you still like your ex do your best to cut all ties and move on otherwise you make a fool of yourself and continue to be used.
5. Insist on no more contact. That includes you, ex and the ex friends and family.
6. No stalking your ex in any way. Un-friend where necessary.
7. Give up being confused. Replace negative thoughts with positive ones.
8. Distract your obsessive thoughts with keeping busy, connecting with friends, cooking, working, writing, exercising, and conversations with your higher power.
9. Be very good to yourself. Do things you enjoy for a change.
10. Read or YouTube self-improvement and personal growth literature.
11. Watch funny movies, refuse to watch or read anything negative for a while. Especially those police shows that focus on extremely destructive relationships.
12. Find stuff to laugh at and lighten up. Stop all the seriousness.

It is definitely not the end of the world. Within a short time the painful feelings with start to go away. That’s guaranteed. You will move on and be free to find a terrific new relationship. Perhaps this time you will do the dumping. Just kidding.

So pick your self up, dust your self off and move up to better, healthier and supremely more satisfying relationships. Finally.

Thoughful Thursdays #29

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Are you a hostage to fear?

Some of the tell tale signs are procrastination, not speaking up, uncomfortable with change, don’t’ trust, I’m not good enough. The list goes on and on.

Fear is the biggest bubble where resistance lives. It’s fear of the unknown.

The cure: be willing to change the way you think. For example, faced with the unknown notice the feelings in your body and mind. Challenge any negative thoughts. Don’t make quick decisions. Wait and calm down first.

Muster up your self worth and the doors will fly open.

Happy flying.

Thoughtful Thursdays #28

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e.e. cummings said: “To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best day and night to make you like everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight and never stop fighting”.

When I read this it was almost too much to bear because it was true. It is a fundamental truth that no one talks about or even realizes till it’s almost too late. The truth is that society has set up rules so that if you don’t follow a particular like-minded tribe you will be lost and alone to the point of death. This mentality comes from the ancient survival mechanism in our brains that looks for safety. And it’s also has a clear undercurrent of power and control of a group under the guise of safety. I don’t know about you but I have been a loaner most of my life and I know that lost and empty feeling of not fitting in. I fooled myself for a long time with relationships, jobs, incredible ideas, trusting those I should not have and fabulous fashions but they all faded. The only thing left is me. Warts and all.

I have had sweeping changes and disappointments galore and guess what, I have survived. I still stand-alone and I enjoy being alone as much as I enjoy company.

Society has its own truths. I would never give up my truth to be myself. No matter what.

Be forewarned that acting true to yourself brings lots of jealousy and criticism. It’s a small price to pay for your own happiness. Be content and improve yourself regardless of what others think.

It will take a great deal of courage but you can do it. When there’s opposition, express it by doing something creative. Writing, painting, running what ever makes you happy.

Is this selfish, you may ask. No, because how can you be functional and productive when you have that feeling of uneasy boredom, are unhappy and living by habit?

No one can do your life the way you do so be proud of you and your life.

10 Wishes

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Wishes may seem frivolous and childish but I tend to disagree.

Here’s why. Wishes are meaningful to the one making the wish. The wish could be for something good or something bad. They may happen or may not. I think that the good wishes have a really good chance of coming true especially if you send the wish to someone else. And thank our lucky stars that the last time you wished someone dead it didn’t happen.

So here are my 10 Wishes for you:

I wish you clarity of mind so you know clearly what you want.

I wish you good fortune so you can help yourself and others.

I wish you acceptance in your universe so you can accept others.

I wish you peace of mind for the next time you are challenged.

I wish your deepest desire to come true and I don’t mean money.

I wish you friendship and kindness so you can be a friend and kind.

I wish you a virtuous life so you can be a good example.

I wish you knowledge of yourself so you can understand others.

I wish you connection to others so others can connect with you.

I wish you open doors so you can open them to others.

Funny thing about wishes. When you send them out with goodness they will come true.

What are your 10 wishes?

A Better You

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Is this really possible? How many times have you tried a new behavior only to dump it after a short time? There are few things in life that are so hard to do. But there is a way to be a better you, an easier way.

 

To be a better you just do loving acts of kindness and give good wishes. It’s simple, easy and makes an incredible difference in your relationships and life.

 

 Wherever you can silently send peace and good wishes to someone you interact with or your community, world, those who are suffering.  If there is a situation or person who is completely intolerable: remain neutral. Have no opinion. Be objective and send only peace. See the difference it makes. Acts of kindness and silent good wishes change the air, change the electrical current of events, it will cause good to come back to you. This is powerful stuff. Powerful, spiritual, tangible, rich, deep and eye raising. 

 

 So no need to stress how to force your self to be a better person because there is a simple and easy way to be a better you and have good things flow your way.

 

 Try it for a while and you will not give it up so easily.

 

 Om!!!!!

 

Thoughful Thursdays #27

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For a change of perspective instead of writing about what is wrong with your life, write is about what is right

 

 I’m not talking about using the words “grateful and forgiveness” these words are general, popular and not all its cracked up to be.

 

 So here are 20 things to feel LUCKY about:

 

               You are lucky if you woke up. I know it’s obvious but think of the alternative.

 

 You are lucky if you are near children because they are wise if you listen to them.

 

 You are luck because even if you are afraid you can face what you fear.

 

 You are lucky because you can change anything you want to.

 

                You are lucky because you can make   your own luck.

 

 

You are lucky because it’s an honor to have any positive relationship.

 

 

You are lucky because you can delete any negative relationship.

 

 

You are lucky because you can find alternatives to get different results.

 

 You are lucky because you can control any part of your life.

 

                 You are lucky because you can change direction.

 

 You are lucky because you have your own path to walk.

 

 You are lucky because are unique.

 

 You are lucky because you can go with the flow of life.

 

 You are lucky because bad things happen too and we learn from them.

 

 You are lucky because you are human.

 

 You are lucky because you can choose.

 

 You are lucky because you can make a difference in someone’s life.

 

 You are lucky because you are more powerful that you think you are.

 

 You are lucky because you are smart.

 

 You are lucky because you are wondrous.

 

 Now go into your world with a feeling of real luck. The feeling of confidence and surety, luck will always be there. Just look for it.