I have an extensive trauma history and trauma recovery, my mother was schizophrenic and my father was an addict so I have spent years undoing the damage they created in my life.
I write to the dissociated parts of my inner world, for example, when one grows up in a chronically unsafe environment our thinking becomes separated into different parts so we can function, we become many different parts rather than a cohesive thinking person. For more information on this read Dr. Richard Schwartz who popularized the Internal Family System method of therapy. This actually saved me, I have had dramatic results since beginning this therapy.
To get in touch with my inner parts who are exiled children and young versions of myself, also the stealth defenses and disassociation I experience, I write to them.
Dear Inner Children, Thank you for hanging in there during the tremendous pain you had to endure and keeping us alive, you did not deserve any of that bad treatment, you are safe now, if there is anything you want to share I am always listening.
Dear Defenses: you have done a splendid job in keeping me safe by isolating me from very harmful situations, I am truly thankful, we are safe now and if there is anything you want to share I am always listening.
I write everyday and much deeply buried information comes to light and I become free and unburden from the fears and entrapment of living in the past.
I also meditate on a regular basis, it is one way of grounding, I practice my art everyday and that is grounding. I go to therapy and speak to anyone who will listen about how important mental health is.
Do whatever you need to do to heal what is weighing heavy on your mind, you don’t deserve to be so troubled and afflicted. You deserve a wonderful happy life, find what you need to be a whole functioning person. You are so worth it.
I have benefited from meditation since 2005. The benefits have been profound and permanent. Here I’ll share some of the benefits I have experienced.
- It takes just a few meditation sessions to reach a deep peacefulness.
- From the peacefulness comes the ability to be detached.
- Being detached gives the ability to non reaction.
- Meditation does not require any religious belief.
- A few minutes a day is all you need to be quiet.
- Being in nature has the same effect as a meditation session.
- You won’t be hit over the head with enlightenment but you will understand yourself and others better.
- You know you are doing it right when you feel relaxed and alert. Not sleepy. If you are sleepy you need sleep.
- You get to separate your wandering mind from your intuition.
- You can stay in the present moment for longer and longer periods.
Here’s another observation. You can’t stop you mind from thinking. So as you meditate you learn to observe the thoughts and not be dragged down by them. Meditation will boost your creativity and lower stress. Increase focus and better your health.
Meditation is my medicine, I keep it in my life. If you can’t make it to a group that does meditation, there’s plenty of meditation videos on youtube.
Give it a try for three months and you will see the benefits. You will feel better and even better the more you do it.
There is one voice in your head which is the one that is constantly chatting, has racing thoughts and is fatality minded. It’s the voice that can send you from the highest hopes to the deepest despair. The voice in your head will automatically default to what is negative. Especially when things are going good.
But it is not you.
There is another voice in your head that is barely audible. It is drowned out by the chatting and racing thoughts etc. We can’t hear it because we don’t listen for it. This is the real you.
How can we observe what we are thinking to get clarity?
Detach from your thoughts and feelings and observe them. Thoughts are like waves in an ocean. Waves rise, crest and crash on the shore. Let your thoughts rise but don’t react to them. Let them crest observing them. Let them crash out of your consciousness. Let them go without judgement.
Then relax. Take a breath.
In the action of daily activities this may not be possible. There are ways of carving out time for getting in touch with the quiet voice.
Meditate, go for a walk, exercise, do art, write, do something that is not part of your regular routine.
You will know that you are making progress when you feel at peace.