Tag Archives: darkness

Thoughtful Thursdays # 85 – Going To Fearful Places

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Machig Lardron was a famous female 11th century Tibetan tantric Buddhist teacher. Her birth was predicted by Yeshe Tsogyel.  She was as mystic and shaman. She wanted to know how to end human suffering. She wanted to wake up so she could heal the suffering in the world. So she asked her teacher at the time what was the best and fastest method of achieving this. This is what he told her. She followed it to the letter and gained much spiritual power. And you can too.

1. Confess your hidden faults

2. Approach what you find repulsive

3. Help those you think you cannot help ( also translated as to help those you do not want to help)

4. Anything you are attached to, give that ( let it go )

5. Go to the places that scare you

Each slogan amounts to the same thing. Facing your fears.

1. What am I afraid of admitting

2. What do I find completely and utterly unapproachable

3. Who do I not want to help because I am afraid to admit my true feelings

4. What am I afraid of losing

5. Where am I afraid to go to in the real world and where and I afraid to go in the dark recesses of my mind.

As a spiritual practice of mindfullness examine each fear you have and face it. What is this dark side telling you.

There is tremendous benefit in facing fear rather than running from it.

You will gain a confidence no one can ever take from you.

You will be a guiding force for yourself and for others to emulate.

There is so much strength in you that you don’t take credit for.

Do it now. See fear for what it really is. Lies. Don’t believe the lies. Don’t believe you can’t do something.

There is nothing that cannot be solved. You are more powerful than any trouble. Use your own power.

You can do it. Believe in yourself and do it now.

 

 

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Thoughtful Thursdays #77 – Luck

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I often say to myself how lucky I am. There are serendiptious events that happen to me all the time. Like getting the perfect parking spot, avoiding a disaster, not getting what I want.

I usually shout ” I am the luckiest person in the Univerise”. No I do not have tons of money or fancy job or wonderful perfect life. On the contrary. I don’t have any of those things. I make lots of mistakes, I get scared, I make decisions with my heart instead of my mind, I fight with my gut feelings all the time. As deeply as I cry, I can be just as mean.

I think everyone is as lucky as I am because there is a natural flow to life and if you take a look at those times when things worked out they way they were supposed to be, then you are truly lucky.

Next time that happens shout “I am the luckiest person in the Universe”.

 

Carry on.

 

Thoughtful Thursdays # 73 – Emotional Pain

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What ever you do, don’t try and escape from your pain, but be with it. Because any attempt to escape is what creates more pain.

From the Tibeten Book of Living and Dying.

I saw a short video with Dr. Gabor Mate and he mentioned this quote and it brings to mind how true it is.

We cannot cleanse what we ingnore, or run away from. It is most difficult to face pain alone. There is no way to bite the bullet or buckle down. The easiest and fastest way to heal is not in isolation. It is with other people, those who are interested in your well being. Whether it be a trusted friend or therapist – compassion is the catalyst. The healer. It is compassionate to take an interest in your own life. There are plenty of others who want you to heal too.

Find them, they are looking for you too.

Dating the Sons of Satan

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Satan is the king of Hell. Devils are his sons. In this world I have dated and lived with several Devils. They have names like Devil Tom, Devil Dick, Devil Harry. Oh yeah, I met three Devil Damian’s, named after Satan’s son the Devil Damian in the Omen movie. I watched that movie and took some notes, the movie is pretty accurate in its depiction of a Devil. Powerful sexy guy protected by Satan’s minion and sucks up all the light he can.

Here on earth there are regular guys who you would never guess travel up the dark side. Until you get to know them better. Sometimes they reveal themselves quickly as sons of darkness because they know who they are. Sometimes it takes years to figure it out because they are well hidden. Here are some of the characteristics of the Sons of Satan.

1. His irresistible sensuality. An instant attraction and not only you notice it but so does everyone else.
2. He is genderless. Depending on his sexual preference of the moment he can swing both ways with no problem.
3. He will usually have one important significant other and at least one other to satisfy his appetite.
4. He will love you till you can’t stand but will be hard to live with.
5. He is sensitive, dramatic and tell you sweet things that your deepest insecurities need to hear.
6. He may speak in different tongues of ancient languages.
7. Can astral project himself and any other entity he is attached to.
8. He is perceived as dangerous, intense, exciting.
9. He may be rich and powerful, or poor and needy.
10. You will feel you met your soul mate.
11. Some are quite controlling. Others could have magnetic multiple personalities.
12. This relationship will be truly significant.
13. He will put you face to face with your desires, wishes, dreams, illusions, fears and rage.
14. He will feel of this earth yet otherworldly.
15. He will struggle with his conscience. You will notice it in his moodiness.
16. You will be obsessed with him and so will your competition.
17. He is addictive.
18. He can switch roles of domination or submissiveness.
19. He is contradictory.
20. You will love him to your last breath.

What is the purpose of these Devils?

This is his purpose: we actually bring these Devils to ourselves because our souls are desperate for the fires of transformation. It is the Devil who shows us our dark side. The side we refuse to take out and examine, our laziness, shame, guilt, judgment, selfish attitudes and drunkard illusions of perfection which are shattered when we realize all is not as it seems. Our emptiness is exposed. We were searching to be whole. We searched outside of ourselves to feel complete. We willingly have the Devil bring us down the abyss of grand scale trickery because we gave our power to someone we thought was trustworthy instead of trusting ourselves.

How do they exist?

They exist by eating your light. The light of happiness, self confidence, assertiveness, dream fulfillment or anything that brings you delight. Dark cannot exist without light. Devils are hungry for the light. We as the light are actually their beacon of either their emotional food or enlightenment if they choose to follow it. It is as simple as that. They know they are dark shadows working destruction. They can’t help themselves, they are born of the destruction that one human does to another. The senseless soul murders humans do to one another via abuse, hatred, anger, selfishness or even worse. When soul murders are meted out humans become aligned with the dark forces unwittingly. Or because there is no other way to survive.

Why do they exist?

They exist because they have a job to do. This meeting will be one of the most significant of your life. You will almost die because of it. You may have more than one. He will not fulfill your dreams but tear your guts out. You will reach the point of being so fragile that you will barely know yourself. It will be feeling pain that will expose what you are hiding from yourself. They exist to deliver transformation. In many cases these dark workers still have light and can be transformed in the same manner if they are willing.

This will be a personal journey with no right or wrong direction. This was the only thing that would catch our attention. The only drama that shouts to us that we need to change something that is lacking. We have a place in the world and this is a chance to redeem and progress.

These Devils remind us that we are great creatures here to bring light. It is useless to curse the Devil. When you curse the Devil and fear them they will bring forth destruction because they see your weakness. To wish destruction will only bring more destruction. Destruction feeds on more destruction.

When you face them they respect and protect you. Don’t blame the Devil for doing what he does, it is all he knows. He has brought you to your truth, real self and crushed your ignorance of yourself.

I have taken up challenges to be on the dark side. I want to taste and know what is forbidden and what is possibly frightening. I have pursued it. I have begged and asked for it but for some reason now I have no takers. Perhaps I am too strong for them at this point. Or I have become a Devil unto myself. Or I have absorbed their reality.

I want to bring out the darkness in me so I can see my light reflected in you. Bring the light out in me so I can see my darkness reflected in you.

I have had these relationships in the past both from significate others and family members and I was left destroyed and devastated many times only to emerge better than I was before. I am much stronger now. However, I still want to be challenged to be a better person, I have always loved the risk of the dark side. I love the dark side period. Knowing full well like the Phoenix I will be burned to death to relive again. I want to wake up and emerge bright as star light.

I want the Devil to see his own light. I want the Devils emptiness shattered. I think he wants that too. I don’t care if he lives in Hades. I don’t care if its risky. I will still stand next to eternal darkness and radiant in my own light. I want the Devil to teach me what I need to see.

I think it would be mutually beneficial to both of us. As I see my darkness the Devil will see his light. As I see my light he will see his darkness.

A word about Satan. He is a gentleman. He is the catalyst of change. He takes no offense to anyone or anything. He is deadly in the sense that he is secure in his knowledge that his sons are doing important work. The difficult hard work of educating the world in awakening. Awakening to know your deepest self. Satan knows Devils both male and female will come and go. He knows once touched by his presence his influence never leaves. Satan is proud of his work. He has an endless supply of those who are looking for a way out or into some knowledge that makes them feel free and real. He adjusts to everyone’s free will choices. He knows we are all responsible for our choices whether we are Devils or not.

We will always love our Devils because he was the one who took us to the deepest part of our reality. It is a badge of honor to survive this learning. It is a treasure to see that the longing for the Devil was the longing for the self and as the Devil longs for light he is longing for his self too.

I can’t say that a relationship with the Devil will be long term. I believe Devils can stick around for a long time if you are patient, respectful and kind. Even Devils need unconditional love. Being in love with a Devil is not a battle field. It is a place of mutual respect, growing and making choices or what is acceptable and what is not. It is examining those peaky gray areas too. He grows toward his light and you grow towards your darkness.

Is there hope? Of course there is hope for a relationship with the Devil. As long as we are alive anything can happen. Anything is possible if you want it bad enough.

In the end the Devil may not be your knight in shining armor but he will be your biggest advocate for change and adaptability and balance.

I love you my Devil and will never let you go.

Hail the Dark Side…………….

Low Country Bribe by C. Hope Clark (Review)

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Just finished reading Hopes book and ……………….

Hope realistically portrays life in the South Carolina and the lifestyles of the people who live there. This is a fast paced story of the southern heroine Carolina Slade. Our heroine speaks with great strength and honesty and her heart feels much.

The graphic detail to the countryside, colors, sounds, smells and tastes experienced by the characters put you in the scene.

What captured me the most was the realistic portal of a females deepest fears of being isolated from what is familiar, man trouble, self doubt, fear, rape and being threatened. The story was a page turner and kept me interested from beginning to end.

The ending was a complete surprise to me. Without giving anything away Hope knows just how to hold your interest and without knowing it you are zipping fast through the tale. The story is surprise after surprise and worth the read.

Dark Poetry – A – Question

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Do you have questions just like me.
about how we are supposed to be.

In the dark of my mind
there you are standing sadly
head bowed and confused.

Don’t mind honey all is well
Eventually we will meet in hell.

by g.piazza

Out of the Darkness

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Out of the darkness
into the sea
there is our future
our destiny

Clamoring for closeness
under the bridge
into the hedges
a brick wall lives

Out of the darkness
the shadows dwell
with all the answers
we seek of hell
the healing, the wishes,
the desire for flame
here it is under the same
here it is without the blame
under my skin
and in my veins
bloody vines ride up my spine
I remember the time
when just light existed
in my mind
now there is both the dark and the light
living together with all their might

g.piazza

Codependents Avoidance Patterns

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Codependents often…………………

 

. act in ways that invite others to reject, shame, or express anger toward them

. judge harshly what others thin, say or do

. avoid emotional, physical, or sexual intimacy as a way to maintain distance

. allow addictions to people, places and things to distract them from achieving intimacy in relationship

. use indirect or evasive communication to avoid conflict or confrontation

. diminish their capacity to have healthy relationship by declining to use the tool of recovery

. suppress their feelings or needs to avoid feeling vulnerable

. pull people toward them, but when others get close, push them away

. refuse to give up their self-will to avoid surrendering to a power greater thatn themselves

. believe displays to emotion are a sign of weakness

. withhold expressions of appreciation

From CODA.org

 

 

Sigmund Freud

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Most people do not really want freedom,

because freedom involves responsibility

and most people are

frightened of responsibility.

Sigmund Freud

Peter Russell – Twelve steps in four

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Twelve steps in Four

 

For a long time I’ve been impressed by the widom and power of the “12 steps” of Alcoholics Anonymous and other addiction programs, and have thought that they could equally well be applied to the fundamental problem afflicting us all – the ego-mind. I have also felt that the key steps of the twelve step program were the first ones.

So here’s my own shortened version of the steps applied to the ego-mind. I’m not suggesting you should agree with me on them. But if they help your own thinking in some way, that’s enough.

  • We admitted that we were controlled by the dictates of the ego-mind, that this led to increased suffering in ourselves and others, and that we could not, on our own, release ourselves from its control.
  • Recognized that there was a Higher Power that could restore us to sanity.
  • Made a decision to turn our will over to the care of this Higher Power.
  • Sought to improve our conscious contact with this Higher Power, allowing It to guide our thinking and decisions.