I wasn’t even remotely confident in myself until I was well into being an adult. I didn’t become brave enough to be confident until life threw me several curve balls. I was knocked down quite a few times until I learned to take care of myself. But you can learn confidence before life throws you any curve balls.
One striking thing about confidence if that there is a truth about it. There’s a feeling and truth in ones own abilities.
Here’s some ways to practice your confidence building skills.
- Do what you believe is right even if you are not supported.
- Take a risk and try a little harder to get to your goal.
- Admit your mistakes and correct them.
- Don’t wait for compliments.
- Accept compliments with pride.
- Look at what you have already accomplished.
- Take small steps to move forward.
- Stay away from negative situations.
- Upgrade your body image.
- Know you are brave and will succeed in anything you set out to do.
I am absolutely confident that you will be happier if you try these simple confidence building skills.
Now go out there and show the world who you are. You got this.
Our awareness is busy all the time. It is so easy to be distracted by meaningless stuff. At some point we remember important internal stuff that needs to be addressed. This internal stuff is for your growth and happiness. But we forget that our needs are important and keep getting distracted.
How do we remember to be good to ourselves?
Write lists, set an alarm, schedule that class, claim time for yourself, put up strong boundaries, protect your own interests, say no if necessary, have an unending interest in growing. You will end up remembering far more than forgetting.
Another year is gone and for most of us it has had many ups and downs. Next year will be full of resolving those ups and downs with endings and new beginnings. Don’t hold on to the past because you are afraid. It is so much easier to go with the flow. It will not be easy. It will be temporarily difficult. So……………………….
Happy New Year
To You and Yours
I am always amazed at Mother Nature. After a natural disaster Nature begins its own restoration. A blade of grass here and a flower there. A sudden tree where there was none, a bird making a new home.
It’s the same with us. When disasters happen in our lives we become swept away with confusion and grief. Just as in Nature after a disaster there will be new situations that emerge. We are the same as the blade of grass or bird.What is gone is gone and what is new is necessary at the moment.
Nature is very wise. It always seeks balance. We are part of Nature physically, emotionally spiritually. When our Nature become unbalanced change will happen to restore that balance.
Rebalancing is the reason for change or simply put change happens to restore balance. Even if you don’t understand why.
When strange things happen for no particular reason remember to just go with it. Don’t fight it because Nature is restoring balance. The quicker you accept what is happening the quicker restoration happens. And while you’re at it pay attention to Nature and its magnificent restorative ability. She is doing the same thing for you.
Your life is a work in progress.
It is the process of uncovering your own natural essence. You will uncover who you are and how you feel. Your mind and heart will open and what you need will come to you if you stay open to your own essence.
In being open you will realize, beyond doubt, that you already have everything you need. Intelligence, wisdom and goodness. That’s all you really need.
If you feel uncomfortable being open then you are on the right track. It’s a new skill.
Keep practicing. You have everything you need.
I like to mind my own business mostly unless I am dragged into situations where I have to defend myself. I like being friendly and accommodating except where I am being taken advantage of. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect my life to have good times except when it doesn’t .
Most of us want to get along and live in reasonable peace. However, we don’t all have the same awareness. Which shows up when we are interacting with others.
We meet each other at these different levels and that’s where the problems begin. We can’t understand someones indifference or cruelty or insincere remark. Why did they gossip or take belongings or leave with no warning?
How is it that some things are so obvious to us but not to them?
Simple yet not so simple. Awareness. Some of us are simply more aware than others. It’s impossible to know where the other is coming from completely. But it is possible to know about yourself. And that is all that matters because you end up being open to those who resonate with you. You become a light of awareness for others. You have a better set of boundaries. You gain unshakable confidence to live the life you want.
You can’t stop others from being who they are.
Others can’t stop you from being who you are.
So carry on with your bad self.
The path to self discovery cannot be found in a crowd. A crowd is the opposite of self. Self if just me and a crowd is a group.
If I am to find my own path I must stand alone, which is uncomfortable. Uncomfortable because there is no crowd to hide in. I will feel groundless because are no guideposts, I will feel unsure because I must make my own decisions. I will feel insecure because I have to inspire myself.
And that is OK. It means you will grow to a well-rounded individual. You will become an inspiration to others. You will be strong enough to stick to your decisions.
Your path is to know who you are in all aspects, your thoughts, words, actions. Your path is in the things you love and the things you hate. Your path is to stand alone and not follow the crowd because the crowd has its own journey. Following the crowd is the easy way out of the uncomfortable work of finding your own path.
It’s OK to bounce from here to there and not really knowing which way is your way.
It’s supposed to be that way. Your job is to look for the signs. If it doesn’t work move away from it. Start of the beginning again. It’s OK. It’s supposed to be that way. Look for your own answers. If something doesn’t fit with you get rid of it.
Once I heard a story about a woman who cut off the end of her ham before she cooked it. Her husband asked why she did that. Her reply was because that was the way her mother always cooked ham. The husband suggested they ask why the mother did this. The mother replied because the ham didn’t fit her roasting pan.
Have you unconsciously absorbed someone elses way of doing things.
What do you want, what do you need to make your life interesting? Whatever it is take the steps to change. It’s well worth it and you don’t need to explain your actions to anyone.
It’s your life. Make the best of it.
Beliefs are concepts we take as true and never question. Sometimes there is no logical reason to believe it.
There are several types of beliefs.
The belief in your own weakness and shortcomings. I am not good, smart, pretty or rich enough.
Survival beliefs. Let me take and take and give nothing in return without seeing the repercussions.
Creating blocks because we believe others have hurt us, so we cut off the flow of energy to them.
The belief that we are strong and can accomplish, finish or create something.
Core beliefs about ourselves as spiritual beings. We understand ourselves and others.
Check your beliefs. Are they true, do they apply to who you are now? Question why you believe what you believe. Did you learn it from your own experience or absorb it? Do you need to believe the same stuff now?
If you don’t need the belief where you stand now then let it go. There’s so much more to learn if you let go of stuff you don’t need to believe.
How sad it is when someone quite young dies. How sorrowful it is when someone in your world dies. How gloomy when death visits and all we can do is watch from a distance. Also knowing that death will visit us too.
How happy it is to remember the good about a person’s life. How joyful it is to celebrate a life that is significant to you. How lucky it is to honor the an important existence.
Let’s make our legacy meaningful for ourselves and others. Let’s know that we are important to all we touch. Let’s be brave and live in the moment because death can be very near without our awareness.
I don’t want to be morbid but it is so very important to make a happy life for yourself. It doesn’t matter what religion, political choice, job or other thing you identify with, because in the end the only thing that matters is the influence you had while you lived.
Be grateful, happy and glad. Realize how fortunate and greatly lucky to have the chance to live. Go now and do things to be remembered for.
Benjamin Franklin did it. All 12 Step programs do it. You do it in therapy. When something rattles your life you do it.
Painful yet tremendously healing.
Taking inventory is not punishment or to shame or hurt you. Taking inventory is to step back from situations and see why you react and behave in certain ways that are less than desirable. What do you feel? Is the feeling reminiscent of the past? Do you need to continue reacting or can you stop and walk away or just be present in the moment.
What behaviors have I learned that no longer serve my higher purpose? What can I change about me that will move me to a higher level? How can I remove any toxic reactions from my behavior?
Taking inventory removes mind blindness and makes you more mindful and present. Taking inventory invites you to be you. A healthy, productive, kind and individual person you are meant to be. Put up boundaries, create movement, learn new things, don’t stagnate.
BE THE PERSON YOU ARE MEANT TO BE. You are not meant to be a clone or shadow to anyone or anything. You are meant to be you.
So take inventory. Do it often and stay open to your inner guide. And be you.