I have been writing in my diary for more than a year. As soon as I get up I write a page or so. I looked over what I have written and it’s the same complaints and worries over and over. When I get up I am to grumpy and sleepy to write well or with clarity.

I have been wrestling with the prospect of writing sometime during the day. Not at night because I am too tired to write and will have the same complaints and worries.

This reminds me of changing habits and how hard it is to change. Even though I know what needs to be changed and the excellent results that will appear from these changes I still resist.

“This is nonsense”, I tell my self. “Stop acting this way”, I say. I beg myself to submit to change for the better. Still resisting I remember how fear never goes away and I should just do what I need to do.

Wow, I learn a lot about myself when I connect to myself. Yeah I’m making progress!!