Our hearts can become broken so easily. Broken from fear, endings, trauma, and tragedy. How many times have you seen something that makes you really sad and feel helpless to change the situation? We have all run across this many times. A homeless person, the high functioning drug addict, the mentally handicapped, the poor, stray animals, the dying. What about our own personal suffering. Everyone has some challenge. It’s part of the human existence.
Tears flow from our eyes when we see others suffer and sometimes see a reflection of ourselves in that suffering. New Age philosophy makes claims to just think positive. That is unrealistic and impractical. You can’t just think for something to change for the better.
Each heart is unique; each heart has to find its own way of mending. What works for one heart will not work for another. Let’s ask: why is my heart broken and how can I move on?
- Take time to be still.
- Take time to grieve.
- Use extreme self-care.
- Try new things.
- Volunteer your time.
- Read about healing.
- Stay connected to others.
- Stay in the present moment.
- Get support.
In the meantime, hold yourself in high regard and shower love onto yourself. Know that this will pass.
Anger can be healthy or it can be destructive.
Healthy anger is the one where we say we have had enough and move to change in a positive way.
Destructive anger is where we take no prisoners and crush the perceived cause of our anger.
Before you act, take a moment to think about the consequences
of each choice.
We all have different parts of us. Our lives are experienced through these different parts. We have the party part, the defender, the analyzer, critic, comedian, intuitive, loving part, parent, child, adult and peacemaker are just a few. These parts can work with each other or alone.
We are not strange for having these parts. All of us have them. Each part gives us information about who we are, what we believe and many possible explanations of our actions.
All parts are good and make up our special-ness. Problems shows up when we deny these different parts. All our parts have a purpose. To help us figure things out, even if you are uncomfortable.
Trust yourself and all your parts. They are on your side and have your best interests at heart.
Your life is a work in progress.
It is the process of uncovering your own natural essence. You will uncover who you are and how you feel. Your mind and heart will open and what you need will come to you if you stay open to your own essence.
In being open you will realize, beyond doubt, that you already have everything you need. Intelligence, wisdom and goodness. That’s all you really need.
If you feel uncomfortable being open then you are on the right track. It’s a new skill.
Keep practicing. You have everything you need.
Now is the time to stop scaring yourself.
Now is the time to put an end to any kind of abuse.
Now is the time to finish old things that are not working.
Now is the time to celebrate who you are.
Now is the time to choose your own happiness.
Now is the time to change your life to the way you want it.
You got this.
There are people in this world who are genuine enough to pay attention to their own behavior. Those who are aware that how their words, actions and thoughts have an impact on those they interact with.
Here is a small list to read at the end of the day to see if you want to change or develop some of your behavior. Pick no more than two or three at a time.
Was I free from anger and judgement?
Did I give anyone sorrow or take any sorrow?
How much negative thinking was I wrapped up in?
Was I stable or unstable.
What did I bring into my interactions today? Was I positive?
Did I respect everyone regardless of name and fame?
Did I take a moment here and there to reflect on what I was thinking.
You can add more suggestions to the list. You can make a chart to fill out at the end of the day. Either way your behavior is so much more dynamic than you realize.
So be positive and joyful.
My fourteen year old computer died a quick and painless death about five weeks ago. Since then I had been thrown back into the dark ages of no computer. I say almost because I used my phone as much as possible but it was difficult. So I borrowed lap tops and went to the library barely getting my emails answered.
Thankfully, I now have a new one. It zips and flies and speeds all over the world-wide web. I am so relieved.
This now my chance to catch up with the rest of the world.
The point of pain is
to show you where
cast aside, shunned,
disregarded, uncared for,
dismissed and unloved
Stop doing that. Please.
This is an old adage. For millenia philosophers, sages and ordinary folk understand on a fundamental level that everything begins and ends in the mind.
We are talking about thinking. Not magical thinking or wishes. This is thinking with action.
It’s making up our minds and acting on it.
Of course this is simpler said than done. If you are fed up with the same negative results over and over again then it’s time to change some small action. One small change will kick in the domino effect. One thing affects another and so on.
Keep in mind it takes about six weeks for any change to become effective. So have patience.
Change demands boundaries and commitment and movement in a gentle way. In a non-judgemental way.
It’s OK if you fall short of your objective. It’s OK if you start again from square one. It’s OK if you re-adjust again and again to get to your objective.
Just start and try. You can always change your mind.