Today is Independence day here in the USA, based on when the Declaration of Independence was signed we are now 242 years old. That is really young for an enormous country.
I am proud of my country, we have the best human and civil rights in the world. No where else can you pursue your own interests with so much freedom.
We have freedom of expression, we are free to examine and choose what to believe and choose our own lifestyles.
Congratulations to our wonderful United States of America.
I don’t want to get all esoteric on you but we all vibrate at our own frequency.
Ever notice how you will meet someone who is passionate about the same things you are. You are both resonating with each other.
Ever notice how if you make up your mind to do something, then you get everything you need to accomplish that something.
Ever notice how worry is a frequency for chaos, you worry then you bring negative results.
Ever notice that when your frequency is grounded, new opportunities and people flow into your life.
Yup, it’s all frequency, sometimes you meet someone and you just click. That is vibrating at the same frequency. Ever meet someone you really dislike, that is frequency.
These vibes are that mysterious thing that Mother Nature does to every living thing, it’s just one of the many ways she speaks to us and through us. These vibes are communicated and felt by others.
Our emotions, physical and mental states have vibes, our food has vibes, animals, places, the wind, the ocean, the world has vibes. Everything has a vibrational frequency.
It is so very helpful to pay attention to the vibes you pick up, this can give you vital information for making your little universe a happier and better place to live in.
Arguing for your limitations: it is so frustrating to hear someone insist that there is no way out of their uncomfortable situation, that they have no choices to choose from, that there trapped in a box and can’t get out.
To insist on believing that you are helpless is an argument in favor of you own self-imposed limitations. Stop doing that, you must stop creating your own traps, be curious about different ways of dealing with a situation, write your choices down and make them real, without distraction go inside of yourself and ask what you need to know, search for information that may be helpful in your quest.
If any of these suggestions make you cringe then friend I am here to tell you the truth of what is happening inside of you. It is fear, fear of change, not being good enough, not being worthy, retaliation for moving forward, the list goes on and on.
It is fear that causes one to argue for their limitations. Resistance is fear and resistance is the indicator that you must go towards what you fear because that is where your answers are.
You are never trapped, there is always an answer to your situation, and you are not helpless.
Will the change you so desperately crave be easy, nope it will not be easy. You will be required to put in effort to uncover what you need to change course and put yourself back on the road to your own happiness and continue creating a wonderful, miraculous life that you so rightly deserve.
Get started now, you are so worth it.
Deciding to be determined is to act without making excuses for our own inaction. It’s an end to waiting to see if our circumstances change.
When we get discouraged we can remind ourselves that it is our own actions that can lift us up instead of waiting for and outside influence to help us.
There is no limit to determination: we can always extend it,
Our own determination can never be taken from us.
Determination is the vow we make to ourselves to get up again and again after falling. When we fail we learn and change the direction of our determination.
The moment you resolve to succeed using your determination everything will shift in your favor.
Try it, it will work, you are so worth the effort.
Here in USA it is May is Mental Health Month. The idea behind this is to bring out in the open any mental health issues and get rid of any stigma attached to it.
Trauma, substance abuse, mental illness, OCD, PTSD are just a few manifestations of mental health challenges.
There is nothing wrong with having mental health challenges and it’s important not to let these challenges fester. The sooner you take an interest in your own mental health the better you will feel. Go to therapy, read up on the issues bothering you, write, exercise, explore a hobby, continue the list in your own way.
It won’t be easy but you are so worth the effort.
There are two things that we have complete control over. Our thoughts and actions. That is pretty much it.
Things that go on outside of us are uncontrollable. We may have a chance to use our own actions to influence the event. That is still controlling our actions. We can take an action that will influence our own lives or someone else’s in a positive way.
We can’t stop our thoughts, that is the purpose of our mind is to think but we can stop useless thoughts by practicing redirecting our thoughts. For example, if someone is talking bad about you or someone else you can choose to stop those negative thoughts that put you down the rabbit hole of despair and change the subject to something positive.
Take note: This kind of mindfulness is not easy, when you start and you can expect your mind to resist change. This is good because resistance will show you where you need look at your own issues. Be kind to yourself as you make these positive changes, if you become distracted, redirect when you can. You are worth the effort.
Sometimes our behavior makes us seem unloveable. We get unflattering feedback of our strange behavior and cringe with embarrassment. We get rejected because we seem aloof and unapproachable. Maybe we are single and think we just have not found the right person. Or perhaps we think we need a trip to Tibet to find ourselves. Are we that strange?
A Full Stop is Necessary.
Part of maturity and growing as a person is asking questions.
How am I making my life difficult. We may draw a blank here but keep asking.
How do I react when I am annoyed, angry, happy.
How do I react when I am tired. Am I difficult around money, what do I worry about. What are my beliefs around sex.
There are tons of questions to ask and none of them are meant to make you feel guilty. The answers to these questions are to make you aware of your own patterns and how others in your life may perceive them, be it annoying or not.
Growing up to be a whole human is not easy but step by step you will become how you are meant to be.
It is not easy to feel grief, we avoid it at all costs with distractions galore.
Allowing yourself to feel grief and cry and rage and weep are very healing actions to take you forward.
Grief that is not felt is invisible and holds you back. Clues that you are not feeling grief is lots of unfounded fear, perhaps you feel numb, anxious.
How can you get to a point where you can organically feel grief? Writing, talking to someone you trust, exercise, getting educated on recognizing grief, find a support group, being really good to yourself because you are hurting.
Grief work is a very personal journey, there is no timeframe, no right and wrong to process grief and your coping strategy will belong only to you. Only you have to validate this.
Is grief work easy, no it is not. It’s uncomfortable, the good news is that every opportunity you have to process and express grief the quicker it goes away.
I am a bit of a hoarder – there I said it. I hoard stuff and not just a little bit, but a lot of stuff.
I’m trying to find a way around getting unattached to my stuff. But it’s hard. I have books and clothes and fabric and tools and dishes and antiques and artwork and many memories and furniture and on and on.
One part of me is entwined with a strange comfort of having so much stuff.
And the other part is teary eyed at the thought of losing the comfort I feel surrounded by my stuff.
I did manage to sell one thing online and it was an interesting emotional experience.
I got a little handmade African canister for free and I didn’t “emotionally” want to let it go. I listed it online to sell it and when the winning bid came in I knew it had to go.
As I wrapped it up to mail it out I was sad. I don’t know exactly why but that little canister made me happy on some level.
One part of me feels efficient, mature, responsible even proud of making a few bucks online.
The other part of me feels sad at the loss of a beautiful object.
Alas, the efficient part of me won out.
Non attachment takes great effort and in my case not all at once.
My non attachment practice is to slowly drop items I don’t really need one at a time.
As I wallow between hollow sadness of letting go of my stuff and losing track of stuff that has been temporarily mine I slowly move more of my stuff on for someone else to enjoy.
To ground oneself in an effort to gain healthy mental health is very necessary. It’s not easy because we get caught up stuck in our heads, thinking too much.
Grounding helps us to calm down our minds so we can get clarity. Grounding facilitates that emotional release we need to heal ourselves.
We can’t heal ourselves from unsettled thinking through a cerebral process. It doesn’t work that way. Our unexpressed emotions and unexpressed truths will consume us until they are looked at and this is where grounding comes in.
Here are a few examples of grounding that worked for me:
- focusing on the breath gradually working up to about 2 minutes.
- paying attention to what you are thinking and write it down.
- coming back to the present moment, what are you doing at that moment.
- meditation, quiet time, reflection.
- do artwork, draw, paint, doodle, sew, knit, woodwork any kind of crafts.
- write, even if it is a word, or sentence, write what you hear, write from the heart.
- listen to music, any music that you like.
- take a walk, breath in deep, look at nature, go to the ocean.
- take a different action, redirect your actions.
- exercise, any exercise is better than none.
Grounding is an important part of getting in touch with your body where a lot of negativity, hidden memories, and confusion is stored.
Our mind needs grounding for clarity and our bodies need grounding to get rid of stored negativity, hidden memories and confusion that it holds.
By practicing grounding on a regular basis, even once a week reaps great benefit and help change your thinking by changing your emotional life for the better.