Category Archives: Change

Oct2

OMG

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I can’t believe I haven’t written since August. Well that won’t happen again. I guess I was suffering from depression and negativity. I must apologize to anyone who reads my blog.

I will not bore you with the details of the last few months but on a cyclical scale August is the worst month for me. September slowly starts the yearly cycle again and October is usually fantastic. I wonder if anyone else has special time of year when everything goes really well and productive and a time when everything goes wrong.

I did work on my art portfolio all of August. I actually wanted to do that for years and I finally did it. I will post my artwork either on this blog or I will open a website soon.

My computer died a few weeks ago and I have to save some money to buy a new one. In the meantime I’ll use whatever computer is available.

Thanks for your patience.

Update: my art blog is:georgialynndesigns.wordpress.com

Aug11

Thoughtful Thursdays # 11

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Here’s an art activity I had fun with.

Find a Stone and Change It In Some Way

I might have mentioned I have a very big dog. His name is Rocky and he is half Labrador and half Rottweiler. He is also 123 pounds and three years old. Needless to say he’s a handful.
So, everyday, about two times per day if I can make it we go to the dog park in Long Island City. That’s the rich part of town and just about everyone has a dog. This park is right on the Hudson River. This area has about 12,000 square feet of dirt and gravel and has been a dog park for about five years. It’s beautiful there but the NYC development has taken it over to make affordable housing. In the meantime we still go there.
There are tons of rocks in all sizes and colors. I chose a fairly big one. Its about six pounds and shaped something like a triangle. However, when I washed it I saw that it was stippled and streaked with green, gray, beige and black colors. Perhaps this rock is from ancient times hidden in the ground until a bulldozer brought it up. I wonder where and how long this rock had been there. I could feel how it was in the earth. This stone has majesty and life. I was stunned to feel nature. It is so rare I get to be in nature that I am reminded of how much I miss in nature by living in the city. I looked really hard at the stone and thought how I would change it. That’s when I saw a face. I took my black magic marker and made a face. This had to have been the simplest art I have ever done. Much to my amazement it looks like a Roman Emperor. I think its Marcus Aurelius. He ruled Rome from 161 to 180 AD. I have read the book “Meditations” that was put together from his diary. It reminds me of the now ancient ruins in Rome. It reminds me of when I was about 8 and in the building were we lived there was a gigantic pink beige rock in my backyard. I would wonder if it came from dinosaur time and wonder how it got there. No one knew where it came from. It was a real mystery. This lead me to remember how I would look up in the summer sky with my friend Billy and we would ask serious questions as to where the stars came from. We were so young and so wondrous ourselves. We never did answer those questions but it was so much fun to ask. It never occurred to us to ask an adult these questions. Because both of us knew our families would just be annoyed. His father was an alcoholic and his mother co dependent and Billie ended up marrying an alcoholic woman and had four kids last I heard many years ago. His mother could cook. She was Spanish and her husband was German. She would follow her husband all over creation picking him up at every bar in town. But her food was fantastic. Sometimes my mother would make lasagna and Billie’s mom would make chicken and rice and they would exchange dishes. We would visit each other by going over the roof. We lived in side-by-side 6 families; three story buildings and each of us lived on the third floor. We lost touch many years ago. These faded memories are some of the good ones.
The stone is strong, stoic and sees time moving by. The stone will live on for a very long time. I’m not sure if I’ll return the stone to the park. It makes a really good paperweight.

Aug4

Thoughtful Thursdays #10

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I am reading “The War of Art” by Steven Pressfield. This is the perfect book about Resistance. Which I suffer from always. Actually I was in the same position as Mr. Pressfield, I couldn’t figure out why my creative life was not manifesting itself. I am always involved with routine and mundane tasks. But when the student is ready the teacher appears, hence Mr. Pressfields book.

Resistance is the enemy to any and every creative endeavor attempted. Resistance will assume any form to stop you from being creative and you won’t even know what hit you.
Resistance goes for the jugular and is out for a kill. However, if you fear it then its belly is fed, if you don’t fear it, it dies.

Resistance can be overcome by investing in you. Ignoring distractions and concentrating on you and your work or direction or any creative endeavor. This of course is easier said than done because, as Mr. Pressfield points out and I have experienced, as soon as you start something comes along to thwart your efforts.

But Resistance can be overcome. Don’t be afraid, do the work that needs to be done, and fight resistance to the death. Eventually resistance moves aside. It doesn’t go away but moves aside temporarily waiting for you to weaken in some way. However by this time you know Resistance’s style and it gets easier and easier to step aside Resistance’s games.

So get ready for battle. As noted in the book, have contempt for failure. And claim your life and creativity. I certainly will.

Jul22

It’s too Damn Hot

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It’s been over 100 degrees out and I’m sure you’re tired of hearing it. I hibernate in the summer like a bear hibernates in the winter. It’s too damn hot, too sticky, my dog is uncomfortable and it’s impossible to get cool.

But all is not lost. Before you know it this heat will pass and the Fall will be here again. I’m waiting for the Fall when the air is cool and the leaves are gold and red. Apple picking and pumpkin cutting and Halloween candy.

Wake me when the Fall is here.

Jun30

Thoughtful Thursdays #9

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Sometimes I am at a loss for words. But thank goodness that doesn’t happen often. I have lots to say and so many need to hear what I have said. This reminds me of a song:
I love Me.
I think I’m grand.
I go to the Movies just to hold my hand.
Me Me Me
I I I
Me Me Me
I I I
What am I getting at? It’s fun to use words in a playful way.Ever since I can remember I have tried to say one thing many ways. For example: I noticed the yellow floor. Or – the floor looks yellow. Or – Wow that’s a nice/ugly yellow floor.

So have fun saying stuff in many different ways. And don’t say anything insulting about yellow floors. At least not to their face.

Jun23

Thoughtful Thursdays #8

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It takes an enormous amount of effort to get out of the denial of how we sabotage ourselves. Some sabotage is visible but most is invisible. In psychology it is understood that there is a need to stay unaware of uncomfortable situations. The need to stay unaware has many reasons. I think it’s the lizard mind protecting us. But when denial becomes a pathological blinding force that interferes with progressing in your life it’s time to step back and examine what is going on. Do you feel chronic sadness or feeling you are trying to punch your way out of a paper bag and nothing ever changes?

That is all fear. Fear of anything you can name that frightens you. It’s too hard and scary to see past fear.

Actually if you are not being physically threatened then fear is a paper tiger. It’s only the thought that you experience not an actual event. The mind does not know the difference of a thought or actual event. However the better part of you does know.

Speak up to fear and challenge it. You will see it has no power. How about practicing a little courage. Just a little. Think about what it would be like to have any life you choose. Even that’s scary. So what is one to do.

Pick yourself up, detach from fear and keep going even if you aren’t sure where that is. You will find your way and be happy in the process.

Happy hunting.

Jun16

Thoughtful Thursdays #7

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Aging

My primary characteristic is courage. I am not afraid to find answers and give others answers. I learned that if I don’t reach out for myself no one would reach out for me. Hopefully others see that and emulate it. Courage also comes with growing older. Reflecting back on my youth I was a real doormat. I allowed many frightful events happen simply because I didn’t know any better and that I could stand up for myself. But once I realized I had a choice in certain events there was no turning back and courage came to the forefront. Life happens and unfolds the way its supposed to even when society states otherwise. Society puts no value on age and expects the elderly to be hosted by nursing homes and relatives. What a waste of human talent. As long as a person is capable why not tap in on the immense talent that older adults have. After all none of us escapes aging.

Jun9

Thoughtful Thursdays #6

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I saw a lightening bug as I was walking to my class this morning at about 8:30 am. That’s unusual because lightening bugs usually come out in the evening on hot August nights, not in June. The reason why I am mentioning this is it reminded me of the cemetery. Not because  I am into ghosts, the dead, vampires or Dracula but because the cemetery is a sanctuary for wild life. I live across the street from an old 1700’s cemetery with a lot of history and wild life. The wild life has rabbits, cats, countless birds and raccoons,opossums all kinds of bugs,birds, butterflies, worms and beetles. I haven’t seen them but I have heard there are even lizards. Well, maybe that’s not true because here in NYC they wouldn’t survive the weather.

Nature has a way of always righting itself. In the past city officials decided to spray for West Nile bugs. When that happens all the butterflies and lightening bugs disappear for the season. Since the area was not sprayed again the next season the butterflies and lightening bugs returned with a vengeance. One night last August the cemetery was lit up like a bright summer morning by the fireflies. The entire neighborhood came out and people stopped in their cars to watch.

There were hundreds and hundreds of them happy to have returned to live in a popular spot. Blinking and swimming in the air, floating their fat bodies in the humidity and clinging to anyone or anything that got in their flight path. My dog snapped to catch one and I stood there in awe and amazement. I had six in my hair and my dog had four on his fur. It  made me so happy to see them alive again in my neighborhood.  Watching the lightening bugs ebb and flow from season to season was inspiring. Even though the area was  infected with poison for bug control nature re-calibrated itself to wholeness again. Like magic the ground was made meticulous for the new crop of lightening bugs. Nature was back to normal to keep the fireflies alive and the other creatures too.

This brings me to the following conclusion: Nature always rights itself with us too. If a catastrophe happens, the upheaval leaves us rearranged for a while. What happens next is the same as the lightening bugs. We pick up where we left off stronger that before.

Happy lightening bug hunting.

Jun2

Thoughtful Thursdays #5

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You caught me on an interesting day. My middle daughter just graduated college and I am very proud of her. Kudos to my daughter, she worked very hard to get her biology degree. I don’t want to take anything away from her, we had a great day at the graduation ceremony.   BUT …

I also go to college to finish my fine art degree. I just got my grades for four classes. I got three A’s and one C. The C was in printing class. I went to every class. I made 15 plates and printed many of those plates. I missed 2 classes and there were no other grades during the semester. I am challenging the grade and we will see what happens. I have never had to challenge a grade. I think that if the teacher had a problem with my work he should have said something during the semester. But we got along really well, I learned a lot and had fun. So where was the problem? I don’t feel I should turn the other cheek or let it go because I am perplexed why he gave me this grade.

Here’s my point: I think it’s BS to forgive those who woefully hurt you because of their own invisible agenda. People express their own crazy subconscious on those who are innocent or remind them of their own problems or perhaps they just like to hurt and misuse their power especially in a school setting. In college, professors are hired for their knowledge not for their ability to teach. That’s too bad because even professors need people skills.

I am challenging the grade and I will state my case honestly in spite of a dishonest grade. Until next time.

Update: I got an “A”
 

 

 

 

May26

Thoughtful Thursdays #4

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“Take sorrow from no one and give sorrow to no one.”

I met a young woman recently that does not like hanging around with women.  How true. Women can be catty, judgmental and down right untrustworthy. How sad for us.

Here’s the secret to why women behave that way. Because that’s how they compete. When a woman, could even be your mother, puts another woman down she is just plain insecure and probably threatened because she is a very unhappy person. Any put down from another woman is a reflection on her not on the victim.  Is this behavior learned or are women generally beastly? I suspect it is more learned than biological.

Here is your mantra for today. “Take sorrow from no one and give sorrow to no one”.  The next time a woman has a put down for you take it as a compliment. She’s saying, “I want to be just like you”. Put your head up and be proud that you have that much power over someone else and your environment. Don’t absorb anything negative from anyone no matter who it is. Step back and observe the reaction of the other person when you don’t react. The junk they spit out on you just went back to them. Bravo for you.