Tag Archives: victim

Thoughtful Thursday #208 – Trauma Can Define Your Entire Life

Standard

It doesn’t matter what the trauma is, whether  physical, sexual,  emotional, neglect, serious accident, assault, illness, medical procedure, victim or witness to domestic violence, bullying, war, traumatic grief, homelessness, or natural disaster. Trauma is a deeply distressing and disturbing experience.

Just about everyone has experienced a trauma. When we are very young we don’t have the words or resources to express what has happened to us. As an adult our protective defences can kick in to protect us and we are at a loss to express our emotions about the trauma.

Trauma ends up defining our entire lives for the good or the bad. But mostly the bad. Trauma always permanently changes our lives. We end up changing how we view the world with defense mechanisms like repression, denial, intellectualization, rationalization, acting out, projection, isolation, dissociation, and avoidance just to name a few. This is the tragic and sad result of trauma.

Each defense mechanism is there to protect us. These are learned behaviors that our mind creates to protect us from the terror of trauma. And that is OK.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel. You can 100% recover from the damage of trauma and all its destructive power and regain your life.

You can’t recover alone. Defenses don’t help. Fear will keep you isolated. The work of self discovery is not easy, it can be raw and scary and uncomfortable and it is an everyday effort no matter how small the effort is.

It takes just a little bit of courage in making your mental health a priority, find a therapist who specialized in trauma, research the subject, talk it out with a trusted person, write and write again, find an activity that will ground you like art, walking, exercise, and meditation.

The deeper you go in uncovering the effect a trauma has had the faster the recovery and the recovery will be permanent.

Making your mental health a priority will bring inconceivable benefit to you and your universe. You will no longer be held hostage to victimization. Never again to be taken advantage of, free to be who you were meant to be. Happy, calm, progressive, and healthy.

 

 

Healing the Past

Standard

HEALING THE PAST

Until we are willing to go back down into our painful feelings that were buried in childhood, retrieve them, allow them, and somehow encourage their natural release, no amount of yoga, meditation, spiritual quotes or vows to awaken will truly heal us. As a culture, we are so pain-phobic that we will do almost anything, go to any lengths to avoid feeling and dealing with emotional pain. We are not taught how to simply be with our feelings, and how natural they are. We are socialized to be ‘good’ and feelings get in the way of that.

And we have it all wrong. It’s not the pain that might just kill us…it’s the devotion to NOT feeling the pain that harms us the most. The trapped, stuck pain that then gets passed along in unconscious, out-of-our-control ways can destroy relationships, dreams of success, our inner peace, our physical health, and our belief in the goodness of life. Passing along the emotional energy in this unconscious way can become a lifestyle that baffles us, frustrates us, and keeps us in ongoing, painful patterns of interaction which we can’t even claim as our own. In fact, we often feel victimized by these dysfunctional patterns.

There are many ways to approach, acknowledge, and allow our pain feelings from the past. There are many ways to allow the child in us permission to feel, and not be shamed or punished for it. There are many ways to safely let these feelings flow naturally, once and for all, and then be released. There are many ways to be real, to be human, and to stop pretending not to feel.

Some of the richest and most fulfilling work I have done in my thirty-five year career as a healer is to help my clients access their Inner Child, and validate his/her feelings and experience. Connecting with and championing your own inner child is one of the most profoundly healing acts you can engage in, and one that will impact you deeply and positively.

As author Tom Robbins says, “It’s never to late to have a happy childhood.”

Give yourself the gift of inviting your Inner Child out of the closet and into the sunshine where you can be together and s/he can feel loved, understood and protected, as every child should.

~Janice Masters, The Shaman Mama

HEALING THE PAST 

Until we are willing to go back down into our painful feelings that were buried in childhood, retrieve them, allow them, and somehow encourage their natural release, no amount of yoga, meditation, spiritual quotes or vows to awaken will truly heal us. As a culture, we are so pain-phobic that we will do almost anything, go to any lengths to avoid feeling and dealing with emotional pain. We are not taught how to simply be with our feelings, and how natural they are. We are socialized to be 'good' and feelings get in the way of that.

And we have it all wrong. It's not the pain that might just kill us...it's the devotion to NOT feeling the pain that harms us the most. The trapped, stuck pain that then gets passed along in unconscious, out-of-our-control ways can destroy relationships, dreams of success, our inner peace, our physical health, and our belief in the goodness of life. Passing along the emotional energy in this unconscious way can become a lifestyle that baffles us, frustrates us, and keeps us in ongoing, painful patterns of interaction which we can't even claim as our own. In fact, we often feel victimized by these dysfunctional patterns.

There are many ways to approach, acknowledge, and allow our pain feelings from the past. There are many ways to allow the child in us permission to feel, and not be shamed or punished for it. There are many ways to safely let these feelings flow naturally, once and for all, and then be released. There are many ways to be real, to be human, and to stop pretending not to feel.

Some of the richest and most fulfilling work I have done in my thirty-five year career as a healer is to help my clients access their Inner Child, and validate his/her feelings and experience. Connecting with and championing your own inner child is one of the most profoundly healing acts you can engage in, and one that will impact you deeply and positively. 

As author Tom Robbins says, "It's never to late to have a happy childhood." 

Give yourself the gift of inviting your Inner Child out of the closet and into the sunshine where you can be together and s/he can feel loved, understood and protected, as every child should. 

~Janice Masters, The Shaman Mama <3
 

Discernment

Standard

Normal
0

Discernment

 

“Discernment is about learning to separate truth from lies, illusion from reality, fantasy from facts. It is about learning the difference between: emotional truth and Spiritual truth; emotional impulse and intuitive guidance, being victimized and feeling like a victim. It is about recognizing the difference between a person that can be trusted and one who will betray us – between a soul connection and an emotional attraction to a person who is emotionally unavailable.”

Robert Barney