Walking Past the Cemetery

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Walking past the cemetery I was inspired to write a little slice of life vignette. Based on a true story, my true experience.

I live across the street form a cemetery dating back to the 1700’s which is amazing for a big city. History abounds there. Spiritual sacrifices happen there, chickens, liquor, collectors of cemetery dirt happen there, certain Santos live there.

On a corner section grounds visible from the sidewalk there are two great pillars of smooth stone. Both are three stories high. One has a six-foot cross on top. The other has an eleven-foot Jesus poised welcomely.

On my obligatory walk to the supermarket the cross was off the top of the pillar and sideways nearly upside down on the dirt ground. I didn’t think much of it.

Months later on my customary walk to the supermarket, there was Jesus upside down on the dirt ground.

The grounds keepers noticed and placed Jesus right side up planted firmly on the dirt ground next to the pillar. Jesus was not placed on top of the stone pillar. It’s better that way. They have not righted the cross yet.

I can’t say who or what pushed the cross and Jesus down because there’s security making rounds all night ever since a homeless man camped out in a mausoleum after removing the resident dead body.

You can’t climb straight up the pillars, there is nothing to adhere and hold on to.

I can say that I have lived here long enough to know this very old cemetery has mysterious ways of interpreting sacrifices, chicken, liquor, stolen dirt, petitions from those wearing all white and those that pray at the cemetery gates.

Thoughtful Thursday #318 – Keep Trying

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I had lots of problems with posting on my blog for the past few weeks, don’t know what happened but I can’t us Chrome any more. I can only post from Microsoft Edge.

I spent hours with a tech and he kept saying that it was something that I was doing wrong, he would not take into consideration that I have been posting on this blog for many years.

So I tried some of his suggestions and of course they didn’t work. I contacted WordPress again and this time a tech who had much more patience figured out what the problem was, she didn’t explain exactly why the changes occurred but at least I can post again.

In the past I would have given up right away, however now I can be patient enough to see these types of frustrating situations through to the end.

When I can tolerate some discomfort and come out on the other side of it I feel accomplished and that boosts my self esteem.

So don’t give up, do good for your self and keep trying.

Thoughtful Thursday #317 – Writing

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Writing about writing, I write to get clarity in what I am struggling with. Lately for some reason it has been really difficult to write about anything.

I am not sure why, I have a hunch that this resistance is from some internal, unconscious, conflict. One part of me wants to write her heart out and the other parts makes her forget because it may bring too much attention to us. She is afraid of people, she wants to stay invisible, it’s safer this way.

I want this scared part of me to know that we will be OK, I will never let anyone hurt or humiliate her again. We are safe now and she can rest and not be on guard so much.

I hope she hears me and can trust me.

 

Thoughtful Thursday #316 – Secrets

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Some secrets are good, like not revealing what a birthday gift is or a Christmas gift or some other information that is not harmful in some way.

Some secrets are confidential, embarrassing, shameful.

Some secrets should not be held in your mind if it is making you uncomfortable or feel upset.

Should you reveal all questionable secrets? Not to everyone, but if you are holding secrets that are becoming explosive and tearing you apart emotionally, it is very important to reveal these secrets to someone trusted like a therapist or write them in a journal.

By revealing secrets that are harmful it acts like a steam release, you will feel better and get some emotional distance in order to calm down.

Keeping secrets can make lots of trauma and that is deadly to one’s mental health.

If you must keep secrets at least release them in a safe way.

Your mental health is at stake and you are entitled to a peaceful life not matter what it takes.

Thoughtful Thursday #315 – Self Awareness and Self Consciousness

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Self-conscious is when you feel extreme awareness of your appearance or actions. It is the knowledge of your own existence. Could feel uncomfortable at times. Self-consciousness is much more about what is external.

Self-awareness is when you can see yourself clearly with some objectivity with reflection and introspection. Self-awareness is much about what is going in internally.

If we can find a small wedge of detachment in your thinking, we can get a sense of either self-consciousness or self-awareness.

Developing a healthy sense of self requires that we know about both subjects, the value is the better you know yourself the better you know others which makes for healthier relationships.

Self-awareness is quite important because it allows us to deeply know ourselves better, what makes us tick, what makes us angry, happy, bored or interested. We can look honestly at our own actions with clarity and choose a wiser path.

Learning to have a healthy sense of self is a lifelong journey, there is no one way to learn, everyone is unique. It is so important to care enough about ourselves to take the time to know ourselves intimately.

You will gain confidence, insight, direction and goodness and no one can ever take that from you.

 

 

Thoughtful Thursday #314 – Opinions

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Everyone has an opinion and in the age of the internet that can be dangerous. Opinions are based on the perspective and mental health of who is making the opinion.

Today there are so many ways of lashing out and destroying others that no one wants to talk up because there is no room for discussion. There is the belief ‘I disagree with you so I am right’.

What a bunch of nonsense, where is the freedom to safely express our own opinions. Why is there this new phenomenon of ‘Cancel Culture’, how has it become OK to attack groups one does not agree with.

The answer is: the mental health of the haters, it would be very interesting to find out the upbringing and lifestyles of the haters.

Those who lash out at authority have authority issues.

Those who defend criminal behavior have criminal mindset and create lots of trauma and drama.

Those who are secretly harboring any kind of resentment towards any group will defend that group who acts out that particular resentment, it is classically passive aggressive.

Those with their own agenda will take advantage of the ignorant and weak minded to gain power.

Those with power will manipulate those who are followers instead of leaders.

Kind people want kindness and the good for all and there are plenty of people out there being kind.

Happy people want happiness and well being for all and would not hurt anyone and there are people out there spreading happiness.

Those who are open hearted would not insist that they are right and others are wrong but instead strive to hear both sides and there are people out there with great open hearts.

Kind, happy, open hearted, honest and warm people and their groups are quiet, there is no need or room for trauma, drama.

Before you spurt out opinions please fact check what you are involved in, is the group for the betterment of everyone or only a few.

Our world needs helpful, honest guidance for so many who feel lost and afraid.

Please choose wisely.

And that is my opinion.

 

 

Thoughtful Thursday #313 – Being An Individual

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There is no team in the game of life, we are all individuals, we may belong to groups, have families, friends, careers but we primarily have to depend on ourselves.

We go out into the world vulnerable, and we must realize it’s all up to ourselves, and at times it’s scary.

As a result, from all the different experiences we encounter we end up building our character and confidence which is something no one can ever take away.

It’s up to us to correct, learn and take care of ourselves and perhaps others along the way. Being an individual is finding the meaning of life for you and no one else and the is the way it is supposed to be.

Thoughtful Thursday #312 – Ritual Sexual Abuse

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Trigger Warning, this is the work of Ellen P. Lacter PHD. who has the courage to examine Ritual Sexual Abuse and spreading the word of advocacy for victims of this horrific and sadistic abuse.

She has treated both child victims and adult survivors and has written in depth articles showing the effects of Ritual Sexual Abuse and the mindset of the perpetrator.

I am sharing this tough article because I refuse to say silent about child sexual abuse and sharing articles like this enlightens everyone, child sexual abuse is a crime that needs to end.

 

http://endritualabuse.org/category/what-is-ritual-abuse/

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