Tag Archives: trust

Jul7

Thoughtful Thursdays – # 129 Trying To Live In Peace

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I like to mind my own business mostly unless I am dragged into situations where I have to defend myself. I like being friendly and accommodating except where I am being taken advantage of. I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect my life to have good times except when it doesn’t .

Most of us want to get along and live in reasonable peace. However, we don’t all have the same awareness. Which shows up when we are interacting with others.

We meet each other at these different levels and that’s where the problems begin.  We can’t understand someones indifference or cruelty or insincere remark. Why did they gossip or take belongings or leave with no warning?

How is it that some things are so obvious to us but not to them?

Simple yet not so simple. Awareness. Some of us are simply more aware than others. It’s impossible to know where the other is coming from completely. But it is possible to know about yourself. And that is all that matters because you end up being open to those who resonate with you. You become a light of awareness for others. You have a better set of boundaries. You gain unshakable confidence to live the life you want.

You can’t stop others from being who they are.

Others can’t stop you from being who you are.

So carry on with your bad self.

Peace.

 

 

Mar3

Thoughtful Thursdays # 120 – When You Were Little You Believed Some False Stuff

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When you were little you learned lots of stuff. How to play and cooperate and dream. However, if you have had a childhood you have had a trauma. What happens when there is neglect and harassment and trauma?

All memories are held in your body. Your mind does not have to recall exact situations but your body will remember. For example, have you ever heard, smelled or tasted something reminiscent of the past? Did it make you sick to your stomach or happy? Those are held memories in your body.

At some point, if situations are too much, your mind may shut down to protect you. Your body will remember seeing your pet killed. Your body will remember verbal abuse. Your body will remember everything that had a negative impact. Your mind will see something similar to the trauma experienced and you will feel it in your body.

Any belief about abuse being normal is never true. The person doing the abuse believes that its OK to abuse. That is a false belief. The child takes on the belief that they deserve to be abused. That is a false belief. These false beliefs become intrinsic as if they are normal and true. Nothing could be further from the truth.

The truth is if your life is less than desirable and you are stuck, examine your beliefs. Look for an experienced trauma therapist. Find it in yourself to learn why you make the choices that you do.

One of the simplest free ways of healing is to listen to mediation videos or music. There’s plenty on youtube.com and with the help of a therapist you will transcend false beliefs and live a much happier life.

 

Jan28

Thoughtful Thursdays #117 – Recognizing Resistance

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It’s easy to recognize resistance in someone else. You watch them hem and haw, twitch and bolt, lie and freeze. You don’t understand the problem in them. No matter what you do you can’t show them their resistance.

It’s the same with you. You will resist that which is uncomfortable, threatening and revolting. Your own resistance is based on fear. Your own history makes these fears. This resistance is based on the false belief that you can’t take care of your self. Which is not true. You can handle anything. You are brave, give yourself some credit.

The moment you recognize resistance it is the signal not to hold back. It’s the compass pointing true north. It’s where you need to go.

Recognizing resistance is part of everyone’s journey. It’s a resource and teaching tool that is in everyone. It’s part of how our brains function to show us where we need to go next.

What are you resisting, where’s your next adventure?

Zoom – Zoom

Jan14

Thoughtful Thursdays #115 Three Wishes

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We all know the story of the Geni that granted three wishes. There are many variations on the story and most end up stating some moral good or bad decision. Let’s change it up a bit. You have to pick three items in the wish list. They are your wishes to keep forever or until you are finished with them. Let’s go.

  1. Constant source of income.
  2. Love of your life.
  3. Healthy body.
  4. Read minds.
  5. Be invisible.
  6. Fame.
  7. Know who your enemies are.
  8. Eliminate your enemies.
  9. The power to heal everyone you meet.
  10. Change your life.
  11. Freedom from anything oppressive.
  12. Happiness.
  13. Be a genius.
  14. Help others.
  15. Be a philanthropist.
  16. Embrace your dark side.
  17. Time travel to the past and future.
  18. More wishes.
  19. Breathe underwater.
  20. Do magic.
  21. Super strength.
  22. Control the weather.
  23. Understand all languages.
  24. Immortality.
  25. Peace.
  26. Be a superhero.
  27. Be a really bad, bad guy.
  28. Live alone on an island.

Now pick, Pick only three. They are neither right or wrong. Give your self the gift of imagining you are living your wishes.

They are yours forever or until you are finished with them.

Happy imagining.

 

 

 

 

Jan7

Thoughful Thurdays # 114 – Three Kinds of Laziness

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I have been reading “The Places That Scare You” by Pema Chodron and Chapter Sixteen is about three kinds of laziness.

I will sum each one up.

  1. Comfort Orientation-we use quick fixes in order not to inconvenience ourselves. For example, our car breaks down and we become enraged at the inconvenience.
  2. Loss of Heart-this is hopelessness and have poverty thinking. We drink, smoke, eat, watch TV, etc. The inability to get ourselves moving into breaking free from hopelessness.
  3. Couldn’t Care Less-this is about resentment. We become aggressive and defiant. We are not getting what we deserve. So the hell with everyone. This turns into depression.

There are three futile strategies in dealing with this laziness.

  1. We attack ourselves for being lazy.
  2. We indulge ourselves by self-doubt and inadequacy.
  3. We ignore, space out and go numb. We will do anything not to deal with the lazy behavior.

These ways of behaving lazy and these ineffective strategies have become a habit.

The answer-become curious about what your behavior is. Ask yourself why you are suffering. Experiment with different ways of behaving that will bring happiness rather than suffering. Sit with the feelings and listen to what they are telling you. Explore your own mind. The answers lie there.

Read Pema Chodron’s books or any others on human behavior. You are worth the effort.

Dec17

Thoughtful Thursdays # 111 – The Language of Feelings

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Nov19

Thoughtful Thursdays #109 – Hope

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Do you have an expectation or hearts desire? Do you want something to happen? Do you long for, wish for, desire for a personal fulfilment.

That is hope. I hope this situation goes in my favor. My heart longs for a better whatever. I have desired that goal forever.

Until the very last-minute of our lives there is hope. Hope for a change. Hope for our longings. Hope for our desires. Hope for our lives to be better.

Hope is also trust. It is trusting ourselves and the movement of life. Hope is not a wishful thinking state of mind. One must be active in observing our own actions and the actions surrounding us. Hope is hanging in there when we don’t know the answers. Hope is an antidote and answer to disbelief, doubt, despair, fear and hatred.

With that I hope you have all that makes your life better.

Your life is not over yet.

Time to hope for the best.

 

 

Nov5

Thoughtful Thursdays #108 – Time

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How often do we complain about not having enough time? I do it all the time. No pun intended. However, There is the same amount of time every day, the same twenty four hours again and again.

Maybe the issue is not time but distractions. I get redirected by chores, mini and maxi crisis, unexpected detours in my plans, becoming too tired to continue, making time for others and a million and one extra steps in the dance of my day.

The struggle to do the things that are necessary for me and distractions is a contant juggling act. My life feels like a circus act.

When these distractions happen I pick a time that is for me. I handle whatever needs to be handled and move my actions to the time I picked for myself.

It’s not easy but it works every time.

Pick time for what is important for you. No one else will. Carry On.

Sep3

Thoughtful Thursdays #102 Trauma

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“Trauma survivors have symptoms instead of memories.” (Harvey, 1990) Adapted from Bremner & Marmer, 1998, Copyright 2007 Dr. Fisher

Trauma comes in many forms. Violence of any kind, addictions in both the user and observer, unavailable caregivers, isolation, and poverty are just a few ways of experiencing trauma.

Trauma is toxic mentally and physically because it stops you from maturing and living a full life.  The symptoms of trauma are depression, irritability, loss of interest, numbing, decreased concentration, insomnia, emotional overwhelm, hopelessness, shame and worthlessness, little or no memories, nightmares, flashbacks, hyper-vigilance, mistrust, anxiety, panic attacks, chronic pain, headaches, substance abuse, eating disorders, feeling unreal and out-of-body, self-destructive, loss of a sense of “Who I am”.

That’s a lot of information and possible triggers but they are symptoms of something that holds you back. Trauma effects everything you do with and without your awareness.

To heal from trauma is obvious. Find a trauma therapist. There are tons of information available to read and passionate therapists who want to help you heal.

If you realize you have been a victim that’s good. You will move from victim to survivor to one who thrives to a warrior.

You are strong, reach out and heal.

Sep3

The Benefit of Feeling Safe

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If you don’t feel safe in your own skin, in your environment, in your mind, in any situation (other than life threatening) then you will not see opportunities to grow.

If you feel safe there is a sense of freedom. There is the belief that there are many possibilities. There is courage to try new things. There is hope. There is generosity.

Safety has a lot to do with what you believe. If your beliefs have made it difficult to feel safe, it’s time to examine these beliefs. Challange them, look them square in the eye and tell them to move over it’s time for a change. A change for the better.

Your freedom is precious, protect it, honor it, it belongs to you. You are free to choose anything. Start small and in a short time your courage will make you feel safe.

Safe enough it change your world. Wow.

You Rock!!!!!!