It is so frustrating going from relationship to relationship, all kinds of relationships that don’t work, jobs, friends, significant others, over and over. There is an answer.
At some point you learned unhealthy thought and action patterns from repeated emotional and/or physical abuse learned as love.
As a result we recreate those primary relationships so we can heal them and make us feel better in return. It doesn’t work, we repeat the patterns unconsciously, and you may need great mindfulness and therapy.
Dr. Tracey Marks, psychiatrist, has made an informative video about this subject. Please watch it, you will find truth and healing.
People are multi-layered. What you see on the surface is a thimble full of information. Society doesn’t allow full expression of who we are. We have roles to play. Worker, parent, listener, activator.
Oppression of free expression and a general sense of uncertainty is the reason that people flock to religion and large groups looking for answers about this uncertainty that can only be gotten by self-examination. We are lost in trying to fit and there’s a nagging knowing and feeling that something is not quite right.
That nagging feeling is your real self. Your higher self, your true self, your core self, knocking at you to pay attention to your own deep-seated needs. Stop thinking, stop grasping, stop being busy and just listen to what your true self is telling you. This is the deepest layer of who you are, where the information you need to expand yourself is.
Becoming aware on this level is not easy. It’s a re-patterning of old habits. You are changing your brain. It is a slow arduous journey that happens in small steps that are so subtle you may not recognize a change right away.
Your bravery for uncovering the many layers you carry will be well rewarded. This journey is ongoing, the learning about oneself never stops, and the bonus is you will understand yourself better and others just as well.