“The Past is your Prison” – Ajahn Brahm
Got some pain from the past, release it. Stop thinking about it. Replace those thoughts with something positive. If you can’t think positive then at the very least be neutral.
Sep21
Tag Archives: anger
Sep19
Thoughful Thursdays #34 Dis/comfort
Our minds are hardwired to seek comfort so there is a constant battle within us to reach out and extend ourselves or curl on a couch and watch a movie.
There is a place for comfort especially if we need to rejuvenate.
But it’s just as important to stretch into being uncomfortable. It’s actually the only way to grow. Just reading books or watching movies is the intellectual approach to a subject. But risking a new experience is what builds us out to be grater human beings. New experiences are the hands on approach to growing. With new experiences the world. For example, if you volunteer at a hospital you will look at illness in a new way. Visit the museum: look at the way previous civilizations lived. There are many similarities ad differences by looking at the past.
Here’s something to try: make a vow to yourself that one time a week for one hear you will try something, new preferably something that makes you uncomfortable.
If a year is too much try for one month.
OK I’m not trying to make this easy for you. You have to make a little effort.
If you try you will be amazed at how you will grow, mature and be a good example for others to follow.
Happy Hunting for new stuff to do.
Aug29
Thoughtful Thursdays #31
As some of you know I have a very big dog. His name is Rocky and he is 133 pounds. This past Sunday night we were at the dog park. There were many dogs there including one that my dog occasionally plays with. The other dog (who is almost as big as mine) likes to dominate my dog. They end up playfully defending themselves until the other dog decided that he had enough and lopped off a quarter size piece of his right ear. Blood was streaming everywhere and I alerted the other dog owner. Initially they were apologetic and offer5ed to pay the vet. Then they wanted me to pay half. The husband and wife owners of this dog at this point started to get nasty and accused my dog of first starting a fight. They knew full well that their dog was the culprit. I threatened them by saying I would report their dog to animal control.
Since it was late on a Sunday we had to find an emergency vet. We found one and the other dog owners said they would pay the entire vet bill. They did not come with me to the vet and when the vet called for payment they refused to pay the sedative portion of the bill. They ended up paying $400 of the vet and I paid $146. These people were conniving, took advantage of me and are irresponsible dog owners.
Part of me wants to get even, the other part of me wants peace. I doubt it they will come to the part again if they see me and my dog there. I could call animal control and make a complaint or I could just let it go.
I have decided to let it go. Getting even is a useless attempt at trying to control the happiness or unhappiness of others and an attempt to relieve my frustration and anger.
I have the right to my frustration and anger. However, I have decided to leave it alone. because just knowing and believing “what goes around comes around” is enough for me. I believe if I act against them it will come back to me and I know their lying will come back to them.
My dog was well taken care of at the vet and very healthy in spite of losing part of his ear. He now has an interesting battle would, a conversation piece and I can go on with a clean conscious.
Can’t wait to get back to the park.
Feb17
Family Albums
I just read the blog post of “Write Change Grow” about holding on to family portraits and pictures. Here are some of my thoughts on whether one should or should not hold on to those pictures.
I have held on to many pictures. I have a special photo album with a silver metal cover that I keep hidden and inside holds pictures of my family and significant others at various times of my life. When I look at them I become sentimental and recall the good times. Not the bad times. It’s a chance to think fondly of these people who in some way influenced me in either a positive or negative way. The album makes me wish for a better time and not the constant drama of egos. The album is a chance to send good wishes and pure feelings to those who I can’t find the words to express how I feel or of those who are not willing to listen to how I feel. Keeping these pictures is a form of therapy. In my opinion it’s a form of grief therapy. Which is probably why I keep the album hidden. It’s the opportunity to go through the five stages of grief, namely, denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.
It’s safe way of dropping denial and believing that it wasn’t that bad, yes, it was that bad. Being angry at a safe distance, bargaining with invisible ghosts of those I wish I could speak to or even an unavailable higher power called upon to help but never shows up. Getting depressed about what might have been and all the lost time spent trying and hoping things would work out. It’s a way of feeling better about the disappointments surrounding those relationships. And finally after a long time accepting what is. Not having any more unrealistic hopes and dreams about the present moment. And realizing that relationships turn out the way they are supposed to and if those relationships had continued perhaps it would have been worse. Ultimately the celebration that I am strong and so is everyone else who has such an album whether hidden or on the coffee table.
As crushing or seemingly supportive each relationship was it has taught me that change always happens and with each ending or beginning I grow.
Happy Growing and keep those pictures until you are ready to dump them.
purelysimplewords 