We are destined to repeat the same patterns of negativity until we examine them.
If you find yourself in destructive patterns over and over it is Mother Nature’s signal to stop what you are doing and examine it. Believe it or not there are signals from Mother Nature and your higher self-telling you to destroy what you don’t need to repeat. This is actually a healthy part of you reaching out and saying: “Enough is enough it’s time to look at what is going on here”.
Here is a secret, you can be sure that your mind will tell you this is not true and try all kinds of tricks to stop you from moving forward. Don’t listen to the lies your mind tells you. Your mind says these things because it is afraid to feel anything. It wants you to stay the same and be safe. But eventually the pain will be too much and you will either squash it with more self-destruction or do yourself a favor and reach out with kindness for yourself and examine what you are doing.
It is not easy to be honest about how we feel and the actions we take. It just takes a tiny step in a healing direction. A tiny risk of looking at your own beliefs, a tiny look at who we pretend to be and who we really are.
You are strong enough, smart enough, have time enough, love yourself enough to do this work, you are brave enough and lucky enough to be on this path. You are worth it too. And a bonus, your family, friends, pets, and all you touch will heal as you heal.
Reach out and find a therapy, a part of nature, a hobby you are inspired by and follow it. There may not be any outward signs to follow; some signals will come from an internal place and manifest in the here and now. Your intuition will speak, your adult self will act and the child in you will rejoice.